I visited my high school today. Hm.

Happy Thanksgiving Eve, everyone!


Before I begin, I would just like to say that I’m seeing The Muppets tonight, and I’m enormously excited. I’m seeing the film with my sister. We’re getting pizza and then going to the movie theatre.


I visited my high school today, Chaminade in Mineola, New York. It was a strange day for a number of reasons.


A List That Will Explain Why My Day At Chaminade Was Odd

1. I was, and still am, running on about 3 hours of sleep.

I got to my house last night at 2 or 2:30am and went straight to bed, but sleeping in a “new” bed was weird, so it took me some time to fall asleep, and the last time I remember looking at the clock was at 3am, so I assume I fell asleep directly after that. I woke up at 6am, ¬†showered pretty quickly and got in my car to drive to the diner where I was meeting my friend (with a stop at Starbucks on the way, obviously.) The driving is a whole nother thing. But anyways, 3 hours of sleep. I get to the diner, out of it. I get to the school for mass, out of it. It was just a loopy day and I am exhausted.


2. I drove for the first time in a few months.

Everything felt super exaggerated and weird and I can’t decide why. Probably because I drove at least ten miles a day for the year and a half before I left for school. So that was weird and strange and I felt like I was flying at one point.


3. Starbucks.

The staff changed, the layout of the store changed, the customers who were there every day at the same time with me during my senior year of high school weren’t there anymore, they made my drink so so so slowly. Like, seriously, baristas, you all work for me. Make my drink faster. Chop chop. Just kidding, I’m not a diva. Just kidding, yes I am. But seriously, make my drink please. Now. Please.


4. I saw all the people from my high school who I defended on Facebook.

Like, literally besides me, my friend Mike, and my friend Tom, it was everyone in my grade who I had defriended on Facebook. Sorry guys, but I talked to you in high school because it was convenient conversation, not because we were going to be friends forever and ever. Now that we don’t see each other every day, and we don’t have each others’ numbers, and you couldn’t tell me what college I go to, we are not friends. So I defriended you. And you showed up…I hope you don’t look me up on FB later tonight to post great seeing you, because we both know it wasn’t. It was awkward. What was I supposed to say? School sucks? No. The answer to “How’s school?” is always “Great.” Even if it sucks. Skidmore doesn’t suck by any means. But the conversation was awkward and now we’re done.


5. I felt really mature. For the first time. Ever.

High school kids are jackasses. Sorry. The guys at my high school are jackasses. Visiting my old teachers and their classes and sharing memories earned me a fair deal of heckling from the morons I used to associate myself with. Whatever, h8rz gonna h8, w8rz gonna w8. I love my teachers from high school, like 6 of them. 6 of them affected my life positively. The rest, not so much. I didn’t have a great high school experience. Anyway, I felt super old compared to the way the kids were acting in class. All the jocks tend to act the same way. Also, saw my glee club perform during mass. They got worse than when I left them in May.


6. I don’t know why I went back to the place.

I really don’t. Tradition? I don’t know. I just want Thanksgiving dinner already.


Measure not in Love, but in Turkey and Giblets,


Kevin the Turkey



About Kevin Berry

jamba juice. mennonite. enneagram.
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