The Final 5…Weeks in London :((((((((((((((((( ugh nvr wanna leave

My Queen, My Love, My Frazer:

How I’ve missed you. But don’t worry – I’ll be coming home to you soon. At 8pm on Saturday June 21st, I’ll be running through JFK looking for YOU and only YOU. And maybe for my grandma and the hordes of fans who will be there waiting for me to come off the plane, like One Direction or Lady Gaga arriving on the North American continent for the USA leg of their “Pretty Young Men” or “Born this Gay” tours. Ya feel? People will be screaming, I’ll be signing autographs. But really, I’ll just be thinking of you. #SlayMama

Anyway – I last wrote on one of my last days in Amazing Barcelona.

My last two days in Barcelona were long and relaxing. I also probably got a minor case of casual food poisoning in Barcelona. Or a tapeworm idk. I packed up and headed to the airport for my 10pm flight back to London on April 23. The flight was overpacked but I got a lot of reading done and the woman next to me smelled like maple syrup and watermelon and was reading a book in French.  The flight was very turbulent but overall we made it safely. Wouldn’t it be spoopy if I were writing this post from beyond the grave? SPOOPY COOL.

The night I got home I went nearly straight to bed. But the next day when I started really seeing my friends again, I was going a little coo-coo bananas because after three weeks of having fully-fledged conversations aloud with myself on the streets of Venice and Barcelona, human interaction was shocking and hilarious and exciting. I spent the first few days back screaming laughing because I was so happy to see my friends again. Also, it was exciting to have Netflix back again – thank Gaga. #yaaas

The next day I did all of my laundry which was amazing because clean clothes are great.

The next day was Friday which means I obviously headed up to Paddington to the Costa Coffee where I tend to do work on Fridays. I also saw The Drowned Man and got the same burger I always get before I see The Drowned Man. I saw the show for the 9th time, and had the opportunity to meet and talk with Felix Barrett, the show’s director and PunchDrunk artistic director. It was amazing.

On the weekend, I relaxed and worked out and watched Netflix and cooked junk food. And slept really late both days.

The next week went by quickly: I wrote a 10-minute play that had its premiere in the Skidmore 24-Hour Play Festival. Lots of Netflix that week.

Saw a juggling show that managed to be about racism, misogyny, and socialism. They just juggled apples and got all of that across. I cried. Yes. At a juggling show. I also went shopping: bought four books. Yeah, shopping. #Fashion

The next day was Wednesday, and I had my first class of the summer term here at Goldsmiths. London Theatre. Same people in the same class as last term with the same professor. It was so funny because all we do in the class is get the prof all razzed up. It’s so funny. He says we have no respect but we say all we have is love. It’s true. That night we saw a show about Syria. It was okay, and got me mildly interested in the Arab Spring issues. After the show, my friend Alfred and I went for a drink at our local. ’twas nice.

And suddenly, it was May.

Thursday May 1st, I headed back to the same theatre I saw the Syrian play at the previous night, and went to their immersive experience Safe House, a play with no actors. It was incredibly emotional and actually really upset me. But I met Eddie Redmayne, who won a Tony Award and was in the Les Miserables movie. I had a great burger for dinner, just another stop on my quest for the best burger. I saw Andrew Scott, Moriarty from Sherlock, in a SEXY SEXY SEXY play. His performance was so sexy, the whole show was sexy. The show was also about sex, so there’s that.

May 2nd, I had my second class of the summer term at 10am. The last time I was awake before 10am was in January so needless to say, it was ROUGH. There are also only 5 of us in the class. But the class also only meets 3 times in 8 weeks, and the other two times it meets are FIELD TRIPS.

May 3rd, I went to Thorpe Park, a nice little amusement park on the outskirts of Greater London, with some friends. Really smooth coaster designs, and everything was themed around DEATH. Saw, Inferno, Nemesis, Colossus, Angry Birds, Crash, etc. I thought I was going to die on one of the rides. I said “Ow.”

I had a cold/really bad allergies that really killed me that day – so I went home and slept for 18 hours. I thought I was dead. Not so though! Would have been appropriate after the day at Death Theme Park, ya feel? Not to negate Saturday because it was SO FUN. On Sunday I woke up with 0 voice. No voice. Couldn’t talk except to cough. I drank 5 liters of juice that day.

I had my voice back enough and felt well enough to head into Central on Cinco de Mayo for dinner before the theatre. I sat next to the actress who plays Daisy on Downton Abbey on the tube! #ButMrsPatmore #IDonLoveIm… Had Mexican for dinner, and then I saw a play about vampires. It was so bloody and moving. One of the best things I’ve seen in London.

The next day, my friend Paula from Finland got here. I met her in Lisbon in February, and she came to visit me! She’s 28. We went to the Tate Modern, and got a really pretentious burger, and then went to see Titus Andronicus at the Globe Theatre, which was the bloodiest show I’ve ever seen, and two people fainted during the show because it was so gory. Nice.

Wednesday, Paula had plans, so I slept in, and then went to class and to the theatre, where we saw Debris, a play by Dennis Kelly. It was disturbing. After that, drinks with friends at our local. The Norwegian gals came and invited us to Norway Day on May 17th. The prince and princess (?) of Norway live in London, so Norway Day is a huge deal here apparently? I don’t know. It seems HILARIOUS and FUN.

On Thursday, I was cooking chicken and set off the fire alarm. #smoky.

That night, we headed out to the Battersea Arts Centre, where we saw a ZANY musical called Orpheus. Seriously zany and clever and smart and beautiful and wonderful and imaginative. I want to see it again, but it’s closing this weekend. 🙁 So exciting and one of the best things I’ve seen. Imagine that – seeing two of the best shows I’ve seen on my time abroad within a week of each other. We met the cast after the show, and they bought us each a bottle of wine for being such good audience members – we sat in the front row and were REALLY into the show. One of my faves. Seriously. So funny. I LOVED IT. Oh man.

Friday was Paula’s last day in the city – I went to the doctor, which was FREE, and then met Paula at the pub she worked at when she lived in London. It was nice to meet her friends. She stayed over at her friend’s that night, and I came home and watched Drag Race and went to bed. She came back the next morning to say goodbye. I did my laundry.

Sunday, I literally did nothing. As in no-thing.

Yesterday was Monday the 12th. I started checking things off my summer term bucket list. Because I have class so infrequently this term, I really plan on seeing London, getting to know her as a city, just as I’ve gotten to know you, Frazer. Not that you’re a city. You’re a goddess among us, Fraz. Not a city. Anyway – I didn’t choose London for Goldsmiths, I chose Goldsmiths for its theatre classes and location in London. I chose London for the city. My daily education comes more from living here than anything else, which is great. And different. I wouldn’t change it for the world. A refreshing change from the Monday to Thursday 9 to 5 of Skidmore, which I do actually miss. I miss the structure.

So I got up early enough yesterday and headed into Central, where I went to the incredibly overwhelmingly large and highly problematic British Museum. Problematic because it’s filled with artifacts stolen from the British colonies back in the days of imperialism. But hey, I got a selfie with the Rosetta Stone, and that’s all that matters. After that, I walked over to the Wallace Collection, which is gorgeous. I’ll probably go back at some point. Hopefully. So ornate and wonderfully curated. An entire room dedicated to paintings of Venice.

After that, I headed to get a burger and then onto the theatre. Saw a spoopy medieval play.

Tonight, reading. Cooking gnocchi. Netflix. Writing a bit more perhaps. Who the heck knows.

Love you, Frazzle Dazzle, and I’ll see you soon. Snog you later.



About Kevin Berry

jamba juice. mennonite. enneagram.
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